{Like a Rock Star}

I'm finally getting my Vegas story posted.

Which means....

I've finally got some rest.

I've finally got my voice back.

I can finally complete a coherent sentence.

I've finally got over the fever of wanting to go straight back to Vegas.

So.......here we go!!!!!

Welcome to a little story called:

"Vegas: 

Where mommies can feel like Rock Stars...

if only for a day....or five!"

First, I must introduce you to Elise's ugly red headed foster child.

Ass-mouth bear was our mascot for the weekend.

Somehow he stowed himself away in my boot and now lives with me.

Elise isn't sending near enough child support!!!

This ass-mouth drinks all my beer and lips off to me all day!!!

He's getting a one-way ticket back to momma E!

We played.....

"WHO WORE THE FASHION 

SHOWER CAP THE BEST?"

Contestant #1 is a cheater for not truly wearing the cap in the way is was instructed to be worn.

X X X

Disqualified!!!!!!

Contestant #2 only wore the cap to impress ass-mouth.

X X X

Disqualified for attempting to use a shower cap as sexy head gear!

Contestant #3 is the WINNER!!!!!

She wore the cap snug on her head, covered her ears, and actually showered with it on.

Congratulations Chelise!!!!!

I told you that you would become a real winner some day!!!!

Good job!

We did a lot of this.......

and this..........

A smidge of this.....

A whole bunch of this......

And the perfect amount of this!

The first night in Vegas (Thursday),  we attended a nonchalant kind of "G rated" show ;)

I don't know if you've ever heard of it....

Thunder From Down Under????

Yes!!!  

That is correct!!!

It is a knitting group for lonely housewives!

Quote of the day:

"I feel pretty good today for being drunk 3 times yesterday!"

(Chelise)

The next night, we shuttled ourselves to the Luxor to be entertained by

"Menopause The Musical".

People!!!!

Listen to me people!!!!!

If this musical ever comes to your town, or you are in Vegas and looking for a great show....

then THIS is the one to see!!!!!

(excluding anyone under 30.  if you are under 30,  the "knitting group" show would be more suited for your age.

to fully get the humor in this comedy, you have to know someone who has gone through menopause, or are going through it yourself.  sad to say....i'm in both categories.)

Even the men will enjoy it!

We laughed so hard I cried and hawked up a lung!

Oh man!  Our cheeks and stomach muscles were killing us for two days from this one!!!

We got both shows at a bargain shopper price!

$70 for both!!!!!!

Damn I love Vegas!!!!!

The next afternoon (Saturday)  Paula-girl flew in for a one nighter.

I sent my personal concierge to the curb to assist Paula with her personal belongings.

Auntie E makes the best 

entertainment/welcoming/sign committee!!!

She really should be fit into the cast of Glee.

We immediately threw on our birthday party hats, and headed for the chocolate sculptures.

The Aria has a constant lingering aroma of coffee and chocolate.

Just one of the reasons Aria is our FAVORITE destination!

And of course the other reason is because they send us free rooms.

WHOA!!!

Was that a tomato, a stinky slipper and a salami being thrown at me?!?!?

HEY!!!! I've already told you all not to be hatin'!!!!

From the chocolate extravaganza we worked our way to the sports bar for some much needed foodage!!!!

The manager wished me a happy birthday and followed 10 minutes later with free birthday shots!!!!

I didn't get a pic of the beautiful rose colored free bday drinks because we gulped them down in an instant and then ordered bloody marys and a 7 &7.

The shots hit our heads and goofy buttons instantly!!!!

After some time in the room to girl talk and sober up, 

we got "on the town" ready for the night of  wonderful- fun- crazy- memorable experiences!!!!

First stop:

Carnival Court baby!!!!!!

We were able to time our arrival perfectly!!!

We got the last three chairs around the circular entertainment bar.

Within a half hour of this picture, there were wall to wall people behind us.

Paula was a C.C. virgin.

It was fun to see the overwhelm of it all through her face.

She couldn't decide if she should be watching the bar tenders, the go-go dancers on the poles, or the freak show of people in the outdoor club.

We were thrilled to have front row seats to this......

And this.....

And definitely for this!

A group of guys from San Diego were dressed up in 80's rocker wigs and spandex.  

They were working the crowd and making us all laugh.

What is so great about Vegas, is that you can dress like your going to a glitzy 9th grade prom, or for Halloween.

It all fits in.

Then you get the gay man that wants to talk and you feel ok about talking to a man other than your husband because you totally know this talkative man is gay and no threat but he doesn't admit he's gay and you just assume he knows he's gay and you say you are ok with him being gay and then he gets mad and says to go get a manicure!

True story! 

Stop #2 was to Toby Keith's bar in Harrah's, where our friends are the house band.

We have been bandaids/friends of Left of Centre for 10 years now.

Of course when we first started seeing them, they played the good stuff!!!!

R.O.C.K. AND R.O.L.L.!!!!!!!!

Now all they play is Country crap because stupid Toby Keith says that's how it has to be.

Toby Keith is stupid.

Hey Toby!!!!!  Yer STUPID!

I'm not a fan of them singing country.

But then again.....I'm not a fan of anyone singing country.

It was great to see them again and catch up on each others lives.

The next morning Paula-girl had to head back home to be with her babe :( 

We missed her!!!  It was like all of our left arms were gone.

Chelise, Elise and I soaked up the moments together on our last day.

Thanks my lovely ladies, for all the great laughs, cries, stories, and experiences!!!!

I am totally okay walking away from my 30's and leaving them for Vegas to hold :)

Viva Las Vegas!!!

MUAH!