"My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it."
— Buddy Hackett
"I'm a mother with two small children, so I don't take as much crap as I used to."
— Pamela Anderson
"There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it."
— Chinese Proverbs
"If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?"
— Milton Berle
— Milton Berle
A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan
Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly. ~Ambrose Bierce
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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